ÂÂ Dutch Falconi and His Twisted Orchestra was one of Sacramento's most popular live acts during the 1990s. Taking the big band dynamic to its logical extreme with up to 32 members performing onstage or on the sidelines, these guys and dolls really knew how to put on a show! I happened to mention Dutch Falconi in passing while talking to former co-worker Dean Alleger during a lunch break, and he responded that he had not only played trumpet for the group but also co-produced its masterpiece Crimeboss Hootenanny (1997). I was absolutely awestruck to discover that someone I'd spent so much time shooting the breeze with had largely been responsible for piecing together a musical mosaic I had admired for so long. On Crimeboss Hootenanny, Dutch Falconi drew inspiration from Cab Calloway, The Andrew Sisters, Tom Waits, and various other sources, but what really stands out besides the consummate musicianship is a satirical bent that recalls Firesign Theater at its wackiest. (Alleger was kind enough to give me a CD documenting a mock radio production that confirmed the Firesign influence wasn't just a figment of my imagination.) There are the few expected showstoppers here like "Jerry the Junker" and guest vocalist Countess Kitten Fontina's Bavarian mobster saga "Lepke Finger Gang," but to truly appreciate this album, you really need to listen to it from beginning to end. In an attempt to fill the compact disc format with as much entertainment as the technology would allow, an 8-minute skit serving as an intermission was inserted at the appropriate interval. Alleger informed me that the basic tracks took only five days to lay down but that the album as a whole took two years to complete due to all of the nuttiness that was included in the final product. Falconi's out-of-print debut album The Shoes of Despair (1994) remains a holy grail for me, but I've managed to download all of the songs off the group's official website, and I think it's safe to say that Crimeboss Hootenanny easily stands as their towering achievement. If you think you might be interested in checking out what I've often referred to as "The Sgt. Pepper of Swing," you can find used copies for sale on Amazon for no more than a buck-and-a-half. As for the macabre tale of The Penis Guillotine, I'll let the DF website take it from here: www.magick-land.com/dutchfalconi
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You can find Dutch Falconi's Crimeboss Hootenanny for sale here.
Man, the laffs I’ve had over the years making fun of CIRCLE ONE, a second-wave Los Angeles hardcore band famous for being one of the very first bands to inspire their own gang. I mean gang as in Surenos and Nortenos, as in Bloods and Crips. As in the LMP’s, the FFFs and the Suicidals. Then I put on their hit song “Destroy Exxonâ€Â, and all laughs are temporarily ceased. What a ripper! This 1981 classic came out on Smoke Seven records comp LP called “Public Serviceâ€Â (pictured), a collection that also featured RED CROSS and BAD RELIGION and a couple of lesser lights. This is ripped-jean, muscle-flex bandanna hardcore of the highest order. Of course it’s still totally ridiculous – but you’ll learn to love it!
It won’t be hard to tell you much about this incredible 45 from 1966 Texas psych/garage band KNIGHTS BRIDGE, particularly when I can cut & paste their entry from “Answers.comâ€Â! :
Made up of sophomores from high school in Odessa, Texas, Knights Bridge was an astonishingly adept and hard-edged garage band. They were signed to Sea Ell Records of Houston in 1967 and cut a debut single, “Make Me Some Love” b/w “CJ Smith,” that oozed punk defiance on a level that would’ve been more appropriate to a group five years older. The record only ever had a few hundred copies pressed, and reportedly changed hands for prices of up to $500 in the 1980’s. In 1994, both sides of the record, plus a demo of “C.J. Smith” and a fourth Sea Ell-recorded track, “I Need Your Love,” turned up on Collectables Records’ History of Texas Garage Bands In the ’60s Volume 1: The Sea Ell Label Story. ~ Bruce Eder, All Music Guide
Sophomores! Correct me if I’m wrong, but sophomores typically are 15 or 16 years of age. Whoa. The 45 has been comped many other places as well, most notably on an amazing CD series called “Texas Flashbacksâ€Â. It’s absolutely one of the great ones, and now you get it for free.
There have been several things I’ve wanted to blog about these last few weeks, but, because I’ve been happily occupied with this and that, the opportunity just hasn’t presented itself. So tonight, in one fell swoop, here’s what’s been on my mind:
How good Rescue Dawn is and how, true to form, Werner Herzog never allows the truth to get in the way of telling a good story (neither here nor in his documentary treatment of the same story, Little Dieter Needs to Fly…
How disappointing Fox’s new reality series On the Lot turned out to be, so much so that it sent me back to my DVDs of the first two seasons of Project Greenlight…
How much I’m enjoying Monsters HD — “TV’s First Horror Channel Uncut in Hi-Definition” (according to their website, they “dare you to watch!”). Where else can you catch Tarantula, War of the Colossal Beast, and The Monster that Challenged the World all on the same day — and the same channel?
And lastly, for now, just how fine a film Match Point turned out to be, growing richer with each viewing. Who would’ve thought that, for all the great films Woody Allen has created on his native New York soil, he’d have to go to England to deliver what very well might be his best movie? Elegantly pulpish and poetic at the same time, it mines the same territory as his classic Crimes and Misdemeanorswith very different results.
Years from now or even minutes from now when someone, say a potential employer, does a search on my name in Google or whatever, there’s the distinct possibility that one of the results that will come back will be the one I’m typing presently on the CHILD MOLESTERS. Such is the Faustian bargain that one must strike with the Information Age. I’d like to make it known that I only endorse said band’s name for its potential, probably now past, to shock and confound the bourgeoisie – which I’m certain was its aim when these Los Angeles-based art cretins launched it on the world in the late 70s. Possibly by now you may already have a sense of the band; Forced Exposure magazine brought this punk-era combo new life in the late 80s with a slavishly adulatory series of articles, soon followed in the early 90s by reissues of their work both legitimate and illegitimate. I bought them all. Some aged better than others, but the one track that still slays me is this one from their posthumously released “The Legendary Brown Albumâ€Â called “Snake-Eyed Donkey, Fish-Eyed Snakeâ€Â. Chugging Beefheart worship drives this rambunctious bit of mouth-breathing, remedial, low-down dirty blues, and I get the heebie jeebies every time I play it. Likely recorded in the early 80s, as the band ceased production in 1982. This is some real late 20th century black snake moan, and I invite you to hear it or own it by clicking the link below.
Bill Maher was a much funnier man prior to his most recent HBO stand-up special, when he wore designer jeans and a t-shirt featuring a cartoon picture of a dragon smoking pot. Bill, you’re 51-years-old and rich. Buy a mirror.
Wow. I really don’t feel like making a post.
The funniest part of the Reno 911 movie? The previews.
I just won a Memphis Pros (our ABA team, ‘70 – ‘71) hat off of eBay.
The Sunshine Kid –My Linda/Get Your Rocks Off Baby –RCA 2413 (1973 UK)
Post Apple single by Chris Hodge. My Linda has some real meaty power chords, a bit of funky Wah Wah and a strange Asiatic interlude, there’s a lot crammed in for sure. As for the subject of Chris’ desires…Perhaps this is why Chris was pushed or jumped ship from Apple???? The Beatle Oooohs are a nice touch in any case. Get Your Rocks Off Baby is a more straightforward boogie work out; again very strong in the guitar department.
Click on title for edits of My Linda and Get Your Rocks Off Baby
I fortunately found myself right there in the studio audience as none other than Simply Saucer laid tracks towards their first “newâ€Â album in, well, thirty-some-odd years.
Just got back from a few days gallivanting around Witchfinder General territory. I Managed to hit one record fair plus a few record shops in Norwich and a car boot sale in Banham (not far off the B 1113)! I came back with around 50 singles -No real amazing finds, but cool stuff including some choice Bugglegum: Nevada Sound with a cool version of Gimme (Gimme) Good Lovin’ on Pye, Bubbles –Hazy Hazy Crazy Crazy (in Europe they edited out the Crazy Crazy from the title), several Demos on UK including Sloply Bellywell, Robin, Handful of Cheek, RickyWilde…
A whole slew of Jam promos (Sylvester –Gimme Time, Bitter Suite -Six O’ Clock News, Walter Mitty –Caroline etc…).
Biggest disapointment: A 1973 single on RCA under the name Hammerhead…weak poppy reggae.
Best deal –The Passengers –Something About You for 25 pence!
As for the Sakkarin single above? It is in fact a demo copy of Sugar Sugar!
Long story short, Paul Nelson, freshly promoted to A&R from publicity at Mercury Records, first witnesses the New York Dolls in 1972. “The Dolls were something special,” he would write later. He spends the rest of the year trying to convince his higher-ups to sign the band to its first record deal, but isn’t successful until March of the following year. In June of 1973, the Dolls record their first album. The rest is history.
“I knew they were going to have to be a big success or I would lose my job,” Paul remembered to Steven Ward in 1999, “and I did.” Whether or not the Dolls were indeed the reason for Paul’s exit from Mercury Records is explored in Everything Is an Afterthought. One thing that’s not debatable is his essential role in the group’s career.
Last evening, 34 years after the classic debut album, the New York Dolls played the Siren Festival in Coney Island. As I stood there, right up front, hearing some of those same songs that Paul first heard and in which he perceived greatness, it felt as if perhaps he were there, too. Looking up at the stage, nodding his head and smiling as David Johansen, still full of the energy that ultimately abandoned Paul, sang about having a “Personality Crisis”: “… you got it while it was hot/Now frustration and heartache is what you got.”
Almost one year ago over at Mere Words, I wrote about the Dolls’ third studio album, One Day It Will Please Us to Remember Even This, and the fine documentary about the band’s original bassist, Arthur “Killer” Kane. That post, “Playing With Dolls,” is reprinted here along with some photos I took last night. Enjoy.
In the early Seventies, the New York Dolls were the reigning rock & roll band in New York City, the darlings of David Bowie and the avant-garde intelligentsia, Bruce Springsteen and Patti Smith rolled into one, and America’s principal purveyors of such newfound concepts as deliberate musical primitivism and the punk rock of futuristic, haute-couture street children. A cult band, they were passionately loved or hated, and more than a few critics (myself included) saw in them this country’s best chance to develop a home-grown Rolling Stones. The Dolls were talented, and, more importantly, they had poisonality! Both of their albums made the charts, but a series of stormy misunderstandings among their record company, their management and themselves eventually extinguished the green light of hope, and the group disbanded… Like all good romantics, they had destroyed everything they touched. Paul Nelson, Rolling Stone, May 18, 1978
The argument could be made that we have the Mormon Church to thank for One Day It Will Please Us to Remember Even This, the first studio album in 32 years by the New York Dolls. It may not be a particularly good argument, but all the components are there for a not even half-baked conspiracy theory:
As depicted in Greg Whiteley’s fine documentary New York Doll, original Dolls bassist Arthur “Killer” Kane, who, following an act of self-defenestration, had converted to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, was working in the church’s Family History Center Library when he discovered that an almost 30-year dream, something he had prayed for again and again, was about to come true: the remaining Dolls (David Johansen and Sylvain Sylvain) wanted to reunite. Not only are his Mormon coworkers and bishop supportive of their friend, whose life of drinking and drugs had gone out the window with him, they help fund the retrieval of his guitar from a local pawnshop so that he can start practicing for the reunion gig. Had they not and had Kane not rejoined the band, and had New York Doll never been made, you could argue that there would not have been the press and acclaim and subsequent momentum to get the Dolls back into the studio, back on the radio, back on TV, and back in the stores.
If New York Doll isn’t the best piece of pro-LDS propaganda the Mormon Church has ever had at its behest, it’s at least some damn funny and insightful off-the-cuff filmmaking. (Has ever a movie come into being so accidentally?) The movie’s wacky elements and plot twists — a faded, jealous rock star, his bitter wife, a quart of peppermint schnapps, a handy piece of cat furniture, an open kitchen window, and an unexpected demise — tell a tale of decadence and redemption worthy of Raymond Chandler.
But in the midst of all this craziness there beats a heart, and it’s a sweet one. Such as when Kane, “the only living statue in rock & roll” and, in Johansen’s words, “the miracle of God’s creation,” leads the group in prayer before they take the stage for the first time in almost 30 years. Or earlier, back at the library, when Kane explains the responsibilities of being a rock & roll bassist to the two little old ladies with whom he works. Or when he confesses to his Mormon bishop his apprehensions about getting back together with Johansen (who, when he finally arrives in the studio, looks like a haggard Allison Janney).
Which brings us to the Dolls’ third album, One Day It Will Please Us to Remember Even This, which arrived in stores on Tuesday and which, like Bettie Page adorned in leather, is hard and soft at the same time. Lots of ricocheting guitar lines and anthemic pounding housed within four Phil Spectorish walls of sound; middle-aged men acting tough, vamping and posturing while sounding melodic as all hell. A reminder of how rock & roll ought to be. How it used to be. Combining clever wordplay (“Evolution is so obsolete/Stomp your hands and clap your feet,” from the pro-simian/anti-creationist single, “Dance Like a Monkey”) and wordy cleverness (“Ain’t gonna anthropomorphize ya/Or perversely polymorphousize ya”), Johansen, whose vocalizing and songwriting have both aged magnificently, proves that, despite his Buster Poindexter detour, he remains one of rock’s savviest practitioners. He leads the Dolls through a variety of subjects and styles while spewing his trash poetry lyrics (“All light shines in darkness/Where else could it shine?”) with his heart on his sleeve and his tongue firmly in cheek — often at the same time:
Yeah, I’ve been to the doctor He said there ain’t much he could do “You’ve got the human condition Boy, I feel sorry for you”
Funny is one thing, smart is another; but funny and smart at the same time, that’s tough. Ask Woody Allen.
Listening to the new album, I couldn’t help but think of critic Paul Nelson, whose words opened this piece and who, back in the early Seventies, was the A&R guy who put his job with Mercury Records on the line when he signed the Dolls to their first record deal (“I knew they were going to have to be a big success or I would lose my job, and I did”). What would Nelson, whose body was found alone in his New York apartment earlier this month, have made of the Dolls’ new effort and return to the spotlight? And would he have seen anything of himself in the song “I Ain’t Got Nothing”?
This is not how the end should have come Who could imagine this when I was young? Where is everybody? It’s not the way I wanted it to be
With One Day It Will Please Us to Remember Even This, the New York Dolls pick up right where they left off over 30 years ago, as if no time at all has passed. Which begs the question (especially with all the dancing like a monkey going on): shouldn’t there have been some kind of evolution musically? If the Dolls remain just as smart and funny as before, and rock just as hard — if just plain surviving isn’t enough — what have they gained?
Wisdom perhaps?
We all should be so lucky.
Copyright 2007 by Kevin Avery. All rights reserved.