Working on it.
Month: April 2007
Bloom –Don’t Break This Heart
2 INCREDIBLE VENOM P. STINGER CLIPS
VENOM P. STINGER were a simply overpowering Australian band from the late 80s and early 90s (post-SICK THINGS, pre-DIRTY THREE, and containing members of both); I was lucky enough to see them twice live in San Francisco & Los Angeles in a late, late incarnation of the band, but if I’d had my druthers I’d have seen the lineup that recorded the amazing “Walking About / 26 Milligrams” 45, which is easily one of the Top 200 singles that I know of. Well, this cool fella Kent from Iowa was kind enough to “friend” the Detailed Twang MySpace site this weekend, and right there on his page is the following YouTube video of “Walking About”. Wow! I dug a little deeper and there’s one on YouTube for “26 Milligrams” too – both are amazing. Now you can watch them both right here.
I’ve returned
Yard sale, crap work, and a day in the country fishing (one bass in a windy, algae-filled lake…middle of the day, I know how to fish, lemme tell ya). Back to writing and JFAL work, both of which are 2 – 3 days behind schedule. How’s that for blogging?
A re-run:
Well, as bad as some real fast food mascots have been, there are some that never even made it past a couple of test screenings. Here, CRACKED presents a comprehensive list of the worst fast-food mascots ever conceived.
Bred without a beak or an asshole, this steroid-saturated, four-foot tall chicken flies into a violent tantrum, beating its spouse and threatening the cameraman when it’s character is questioned. It then writes a best-selling memoir, exposing fellow mascot chickens of also beefing up. Then its genitals implode.
“Applebee’s Strumpet Waitress,â€Â Applebee’s
When she’s not working a double, sporadic nursing student “Amyâ€Â has unprotected sex with random men who wear visors and barbed wire tattoos. Her latest child, Trey, is named after that dude who makes the salads who is probably the father. Her catchphrase: “The optimistic slogans on the buttons I wear help me get through the day without crying!â€Â proved to be one of the least successful catchphrases of all time.
“‘Let It Go’ Larry,â€Â Carl’s Junior
After a failed attempt at using a bikini clad Paris Hilton to make burgers topped with onion rings sexy, Carl’s Junior adopted a resounding “fuck itâ€Â stance with Larry, the antithesis of Subway’s Jared. Addicted to Carl’s Junior’s Rodeo Burger and tattered word jumbles, Larry is 380 pounds of food-stained, slow-moving apathy.
While initially envisioned as a good natured cross between the Family Circus’ “Not Meâ€Â character and the Coz’s “Ghost Dadâ€Â the decision to portray Thomas’ face as realistically decomposed, along with his catch phrase, “Oh oooooooh, oooooooh how I miss the natural world! I’d suck dick for a Junior Bacon Cheeseburger,â€Â lent the campaign a creepy air of necrophilia that proved decidedly unappetizing.
To accentuate the McRib’s intermittent appearances on the McDonald’s menu, the fast food giant tossed around the idea of a transient, suitcase-toting father/husband figure, desperately trying to re-acclimate himself into the family fold. The pilot advertisement featured the mascot banging on the front door, yelling his never-to-catch-on catch phrases, “Baby, I’m back, please give me another chanceâ€Â, and culminated with Harold sulking at the OTB, solemnly addressing the audience with a closing statement, “Don’t make the McRib go away again.â€Â
“The Horse,â€Â Arby’s
To alleviate a restaurant-wide surplus of “Horsey Sauceâ€Â packets, Arby’s briefly ran an ad featuring an electroanimatronic horse that approached tables with baskets of “Horsey Sauceâ€Â, repeating the gleeful claim, “It comes from meeeeeee!!!â€Â However, actors’ inability to get through dress rehearsals without vomiting ensured that the campaign never got off the ground.
“Have You Seen The White Castle Ads?!?!?!â€Â White Castle
Riding the wake of Burger King’s recent and wildly successful what-the-fuck?? ad campaign featuring the King and the giant droning, cowboy hat-wearing tooth, White Castle launched a confuse-off that was apparently too intense for focus group participants. Promos focused on an eight-foot, African-American cowboy with a mechanical arm and a glowing red eye that crashes into private homes through the wall or window, extracts the residents by the backs of their necks, takes them an unknown distance to a White Castle location, and throws them into the dining area through the plate glass window. The gargantuan cowboy then joins the bedraggled, moderately injured party at a table and begins to recite dialogue from the 2002 Robert Duvall film, Assassination Tango. Campaign was also designed to provide work for young, creative, funny, and pop-culturally literate idea people that insist on wearing New Balance sneakers with blazers.
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Everything Is an Afterthought
As previously mentioned, I recently sold my first book. In conjunction, I’ve established another LiveJournal to report on the project’s progress, occasionally provide links about, and writings by, its subject, Paul Nelson, and share snippets of information or parts of interviews that may or may not be covered further in the final product.
The new journal shares the book’s working title, Everything Is an Afterthought: The Life and Writings of Paul Nelson. Just follow the link.
Anybody interested in learning more about this brilliant critic, whose own life proved just as mysterious and fascinating as the artists’ about whom he wrote, is welcome to join. As well, tracking the process of how a book goes from sale to publication should prove interesting. I’m rather curious about that part myself…
The Hip ‘n’ Edgy Update
I’m big enough to admit when the New York Times gets it right, and it seems that a couple of weeks ago, that’s just what they did with their recent article on Brunnenstr. as the new art district of Berlin. Actually, it’s one of several, and the more serious one is down on Zimmerstr. by Checkpoint Charlie where the big guns have huge spaces inside some kind of old warehouse. And I’d say there’s a reason that the Times used a picture of a cute beagle instead of any of the art on display, because most of what I saw on a recent walk up the street from Rosenthaler Platz to Bernauer Str. was pretty boring. I’d say that the Brunnenstr. galleries are sort of an arts lab, where talent can be developed.
And it’s kind of not fair for Peter Herrmann to have moved his exquisite gallery for African antiquities, currently showing some astonishing Ife bronzes from Nigeria, onto the block. It just makes the other galleries’ daubings and scrapings look sick. Definitely worth a visit, though. (Interestingly, I’ve been in that building before, since it once held the Amiga recording studios, the place where all the DDR’s pop acts recorded for the state label. A friend was recording a DDR dissident band called Die Vision there, as the tea-ladies cringed.)
But what’s really not fair on Brunnenstr. is the blatant move by Sony to co-opt Berlin street art. A few weeks ago, I mentioned in passing that I’d noticed a lot of broken windows around town recently, one of them in the old Beate Uhse shop at the start of Brunnenstr next to the collection of greasy spoons. A little research shows why this has happened. First, we started seeing brown-paper circles that said www.dont-forget-the-game. com all over the place. When you go there, the first thing you come upon is a blog, which purports to discuss street art. Fine, but click on the photo gallery link and it gets more insidious.
It’s an ad. In fact, if you go down to Brunnenstr. to the old Beate Uhse place, there’s a bilingual sheet of paper posted there bragging that Sony has gotten Berlin street-artists to cooperate with them in promoting the new PlayStation Portable System (PSP) device. So we have a huge number of stencilled brown-paper women caressing huge PSPs, many of which have been defaced by street-artist 6, and everywhere you look, someone’s stuck a PSP-shaped sticker with their custom design on it. Other “artists” have made PSP-shaped art which is on display around the corner on Torstr. in a fake art gallery.
Now I understand the rocks through the windows. And it’s depressing to walk around and have to wonder if the latest piece of street art is, in fact, some lame-ass viral marketing campaign. I wonder how they enlisted these guys. Just handed ’em a PSP? Was money involved? I have to say, I saw one of these in action when I flew to America last month, and although the game being played was that moronic car-crash one, the graphics were extremely impressive. I wouldn’t mind having one (well, if there were a game that could hold my interest for more than ten minutes, anyway, which there rarely are on these systems), but would I viral-write an article about it for one? I don’t think so.
So boo to the supposed “street artists” who let themselves be pimped by Sony, hooray to the ad-busting graffiti artists who are sabotaging the campaign, and, like that car whose ads were everywhere a couple of monts ago — what was it called again? — may this fade from view as soon as possible.
Meanwhile, a bit of street art from Brunnenstr. that I really find impressive:
Panther – One Man Band
After one unforgettable first single (see review January 15th), and a so so follow up, Frank Klunhaar AKA Pantherman seemed to have developed a serious personality disorder. He may be trying to look tough on the cover, but it’s obvious that he had lost his nerve –the mask is gone and his claws are clipped. These lyrics say it all…
Year of the Dog
For his directorial debut, Mike White chose to make a movie (based on his own original screenplay) that’s a treatise about loneliness and people who have love but can’t find a place to put it. Like many of the characters in White’s previous scripts (to name a notable few: Chuck and Buck, School of Rock, Orange County, three episodes of Freaks and Geeks, and one of my all-time favorite films, The Good Girl), Year of the Dog‘s Peggy (played by Molly Shannon) doesn’t quite have a sense of herself; her strong feelings and opinions locate her a little outside of the mainstream. The thing is, the people in the orbit of her life who don’t get her, whose eyebrows and judgment she raises, are no less idiosyncratic.
Following the surprising but inevitable course that Peggy’s life takes, Shannon is excellent, as is the rest of the cast, with the ever-dependable John C. Reilly, Peter Sarsgaard, and John Pais particularly outstanding.
As exemplified by a user comment at IMDb, the film is far from the chick flick that its plot and advertising suggests: ” I thought I was going to see a funny movie. I came home feeling suicidal. If I wanted to see a pathetic over-40 woman who has bad dates and lives alone with the pets she dotes on too much, I woulda stayed home and stared in the mirror!” Year of the Dog — the chick flick from hell?
Regardless, by movie’s end, as in all of White’s work, he manages to humanize his offbeat characters so that we, too, can understand and perhaps even identify with them — if we hadn’t already all along.
GIRLS AT OUR BEST LINK CORRECTED
The song “Getting Nowhere Fast” has been restored for your downloading pleasure on our Monday, April 16th post on GIRLS AT OUR BEST. The song is now complete, and can be played or downloaded.
For trading purposes…
Abacus -Indian Dancer (DEMO) York UK EX
American Jam Band-American Jam (DEMO) Parlaphone UK EX
Captain Captain Groovy & His Bubblegum Army -Captain Groovy…/Dark Part of My Mind (Pic sleeve) Ariola Ger EX/EX
Firebird -Two Wheels Bell UK EX
Galahad -Rocket Summer (Pic sleeve) Bell Ger EX/EX
Hector -Wired Up (DEMO) DJM UK EX
Kristine Sparkle -Hokey Cokey/ Baby I Love You Decca UK VG+
Light Fantastic -Take Me, Shake Me Blue Jean UK EX
Living Force -Ride Ride Ride/Some People Chapter 1 UK EX
Mustard -Good Time Coming EMI UK VG (slight warp)
Ning -Machine (Pic Sleeve) Decca Ger VG+/VG+
Peter D. Kelly -Rock To The Juke Box (DEMO) DJM UK EX
Rats -Turtle Dove (DEMO) Good Ear UK EX
Rubber Duckie (10CC) -A Teenager In Love (DEMO) EMI UK EX
Sensation -Black Eyed Woman/Baby (Pic Sleeve) Sirocco Fra EX/EX
Shelby -Dance With The Guitar Man (Pic Sleeve) Ariola Ger VG+/VG
Solent -My World Fell Down Decca UK EX
Yellow Bird -Attack Attack (Pic Sleeve) Ariola Ger VG/EX